Monthly Archives: February 2014

The Worst Witch

M and I finished AHS Coven a week or so ago and I am so, so, so disappointed at all the wasted potential. I was very excited when Coven was announced; witches have been my thing since I was very small and a show about witches set in one of my favorite cities? With Jessica Lange returning and Angela Bassett appearing? What could go wrong?


Apparently everything.


I know, Myrtle, I know. But you know they did you dirty. You were hands down the best part of the season. You’ll always be the Supreme of my heart.

This is what they should have done:

Cut out Madame LaLaurie. Kathy Bates is awesome. Kathy Bates as Madame LaLaurie was awesome. I mean, she did give us some great lines.


But Murphy & Co really didn’t know what to do with her other than to use her as justification for slavery torture porn, which was unnecessary. So I would have cut her out completely. But where does the tension between Marie and the other witches come from? Easy. Have Queenie originally come from Marie’s camp. She could have been Marie’s protégé, on her way to becoming a powerful Voodoo Queen in her own right, when the powers of Salem come calling. Curious about her new powers and probably knowing Marie will never step down, Queenie joins up with the Robichaux’s witches and that pisses Marie off. Epic power battle begins.


(I mean, look at this fabulousness. I wouldn’t want to piss of the woman underneath that fantastic fro)

I also would have either cut out the witch hunter storyline or introduced it earlier in the season. As it stands, that plot line was tied up too neatly. I find it really hard to believe that there weren’t any other witch hunters and this one corporation had the monopoly on witch hunting.

I would have left out the Kyle-Zoe-Madison love triangle snoozefest. Kyle was completely unnecessary to the story, but if they had to have some sort of teenage romance going on, they should have left him alive. Let Zoe try to navigate having an alive boyfriend with that deadly vagina of hers, while trying to keep the fact that she’s a witch secret. Much more interesting.

I also would have given Stevie Nicks something better to do. Poor lady.

More Myrtle Snow. I love her. She’s wonderful and wonderfully creepy playing the Theremin in the greenhouse.

Jesus Mom and son only get to stay if it sets up Nan to be the Supreme. She seemed to have the most growth out of all the girls and, really, she didn’t deserve to be drowned in a bathtub. She’s probably happy hanging out with Papa Legba, though. Dude knows how to party.

Delia in no way earned her Supremacy. She was easily the weakest witch in the house: marrying a witch hunter, getting blinded, not teaching the girls any magic, letting her charges run roughshod over her, letting her mother run roughshod over her. She had no backbone to her at all and couldn’t stand up for herself. She could have easily stayed on as headmistress for the school because that’s about the only thing she was good for. And not even that really because it didn’t seem like there were any lessons going on at the school. Just a lot of cat-fights and killings and name callings and baby snatching (won’t someone please go to the attic to rescue that poor baby from Spaulding? They have to know she’s there, right? Right?!)

In spite of my disappointment with this season, I’ll still watch the next. I love horror anthologies and this is pretty much all we have on tv right now. AHS Murder House is still my favorite, although I’ll be giving Asylum another go since I didn’t finish it.


“Reluctantly crouched at the starting line, Engines pumping and thumping in time”

Finished second Couch to 5K run. 30 minutes of intervals gets me almost 2 miles according to my RunKeeper. The time flew by again, although I did have to alter my route when I realized I hadn’t reached the halfway point and I was already almost home. So here’s the second half of my run playlist:

A Perfect Circle: Judith and Pet
Saliva: Ladies and Gentlemen
Rick Ross: 100 Black Coffins
James Brown & Tupac: Unchained (The Payback/Untouchable)
Brother Dege: Too Old to Die Young
Queen: I Want it All/We Will Rock You Mash-Up (feat. Armageddon)
Tomoyasu Hotei: Battle Without Honor or Humanity
Ministry: Bad Blood
Lunatic Calm: Leave You Far Behind
Limp Bizkit: Take a Look Around
Metallica: I Disappear
Rob Zombie: Scum of the Earth
Slipknot: Duality
Kenny Loggins: Danger Zone
The Heavy: Short Change Hero
Janelle Monae: Givin Em What They Love
Bastille: Pompeii
Lorde: Royals

So that’s my runlist. Some songs get me more pumped than others, but they all do the trick when I need motivation for an extra bit of speed. I’m always looking to add to it though, if there are any suggestions.

Structure to my flailings

Today I started day one on a couch to 5k. I needed to add some structure to my runs; I was getting bored with running every Tues/Thurs without a real goal in mind. This way I can build up to running a 5k, although I might never actually run a 5k. I feel pretty good about this. 25 minutes went by faster than it normally does and I ran/walked about a mile and a half. That’s pretty good for me.

Music is pretty important to me when I run. A while ago, a friend asked me what I listened to when I ran. Pretty much anything that makes me dance. Or get’s me pumped up in some way. I need things that are high energy because it’s too easy for me to lose momentum. I’ll post half my playlist now and the other half on Thursday after my day two run. These are in the order that they show up on my playlist, but I use the shuffle function so it’s not the order I hear them in.

Audioslave: Cochise and Show Me How to Live
Cee Lo Green: Fuck You
Chevelle: Vitamin R and The Red
Florence + The Machine: Dog Days Are Over
Hugo: 99 Problems
Imagine Dragons: Radioactive
Kanye West: Stronger and Gold Digger
Ke$ha: Tik Tok
Korn: Coming Undone and Twisted Transistor
LMFAO: Sexy and I Know It
Ludacris: Move Bitch
Nine Inch Nails: Head Like a Hole
The Offspring: Bad Habit
A Perfect Circle: Outsider (Apocalypse Remix) and Passive

What I think about when I think about running

(with apologies to Haruki Murakami)

I have recently taken up running. When I say recently, I mean I started running several months ago, almost every day (which is a big deal for me), then stopped when my vacation hit in October and didn’t pick my shoes back up again until after the New Year. I kick myself for such a long break. It’s very easy for me to lose momentum, especially with something I don’t enjoy doing–and I never enjoyed running, even when I was young and had fewer creaky bits. Moving my body through space at a pace faster than a walk seems ponderous to me and I wonder why I do it.

I have yet to hit the Zen state of empty mind when I run; I’ve gotten better about not focusing on how much my lungs hurt, how much my legs ache, how hard my heart is pounding in my chest. Used to be all I could think about was those things and my runs and my motivation suffered for it. Now I focus harder on the music in my ears and that seems to help turn my attention away from my body screaming at me. I do get that high when I’m done, though. It’s a brief euphoria. Not enough for me to chase the dragon hard, but enough for me to wonder why I don’t run more often. I will probably get there. I’ve made a promise to myself to run every week and my treat is a Night Vale Sheriff’s Secret Police hoodie in it if I can do it by my birthday. I want that hoodie pretty bad, so that’s great motivation.